


here’s his health in water

by orlesiantitans



Series: Damerey Daily 2020 [3]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Attempt at Humor, Damerey Daily 2020, F/M, Humor, I prove I think I'm funny, When in reality I'm just a massive dork, once again
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-03
Updated: 2020-01-03
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:35:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22105675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orlesiantitans/pseuds/orlesiantitans
Summary: “Vodka.”Rey snaps out of the daydream she’d found herself in with a few blinks. A man – perhaps thirty, a little harried-looking, stares at her desperately. He’s very pretty.
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Rey
Series: Damerey Daily 2020 [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1588942
Comments: 6
Kudos: 70
Collections: Damerey Daily 2020





	here’s his health in water

**Author's Note:**

> Day 3 of Damerey Daily 2020. Title from 'Here's his Health in Water' by Robert Burns. This is written in the hope someone out there finds my jokes as funny as I do.

“Vodka.”  
  


Rey snaps out of the daydream she’d found herself in with a few blinks. A man – perhaps thirty, a little harried-looking, stares at her desperately. He’s very pretty.

She’s never been good with pretty boys.

“Uh. What?”

He heaves a sigh and his eyes widen. Pleading. What’s he pleading with her for? “Vodka. I need vodka. Now. Please? Like, yesterday. And if anyone asks, it’s water.”

“Why do you need vodka?”

“Why do I...” he lets out an incredulous noise. “Never you mind why I need vodka! You’re a bartender, right? Please, please, _please_ just get me vodka. And if an old latino guy comes over here asking what it is...”

He shakes the glass when she gives it to him, throwing some ice on top to make it more realistic.

“It’s water, yeah, got it,” she replies. His voice had gone almost comically high as he spoke, and she leaned forwards in the counter as she watched him leave. He had quite the pair of beautiful, swaying hips and while Rey wasn’t an expert on men or romance or really _anything_ except making a mean mojito and fixing cars, she knew how to appreciate things she wasn’t an expert on.

She just happened to file ‘men’ in the same category as ‘expensive lipsticks’. She’d told Rose this once, who’d kind of stared at her like she was strange and then laughed until she realized Rey wasn’t joking.

Rey honestly doesn’t see why it was so funny. Men were very strange creatures, with the exception of Finn, and Finn was a whole brand of strange all on his own.

She’s his best friend, so she considers herself allowed to say that.

It’s an hour before the guy appears again. He holds his hands up in quotation marks either side of his face. “Water.”

She wonders what he’s stressing about so much as she pours the vodka in his glass, and asks him. His lips quirk out, “Ah, the old bartender trick to try and get my secrets, huh? Well, I’m no open book, lady.”

“Rey.”

“What?”

“My name is Rey. Not ‘lady’. And why would I want or need your secrets? It’s the 21st century, there’s not much of a market for secrets any more. If it was the middle ages, I’d maybe understand your hesitance more, if you were a nobleman, or perhaps in the habit of carrying fish in suspicious circumstances.”

He stares at her, “What?”

She wonders if this is perhaps another faux pas. Finn had once ruffled her hair, told her he loved her, but also told her she was a ‘bit of an oddball sometimes’. Which was fair, but being socially awkward due to years of social isolation wasn’t a crime. And besides, the only other person she spent a significant amount of time with was her old teacher, Luke, who found her jokes funny.

“Handling salmon in suspicious circumstances. It’s an old British law. You could be arrested for it,” she states plainly.

He blinks, “Always knew you lot were weird. Brits.”

He walks away, and she stares at his back.

It’s another half hour before someone else turns up. An older man, latino.

“Hey, I don’t suppose there’s been a guy up here asking for vodka?” he asks. “We’re having a family reunion, and his abuela’s a bit much sometimes, but he’s a little flushed and she _will_ notice if he’s drunk.”

Rey gets the impression that her odd patron is probably this man’s son. Or nephew. Or something. ‘A bit much’ doesn’t give her a lot of information, but it’s enough to guess why he might be drinking. Families can be complicated. Luke’s family, for example, seems full of angst and complications. His nephew was in a cult for a good few years, and apparently it was less the kind of cult where you smoke weed and reject the establishment and more the kind of cult where you have odd ideas about world domination and changing your name to Kyle Ron. Or something. Rey only met the guy once, and he ended up having an argument with his dad while his weaselly ginger boyfriend sat in the corner with popcorn he’d produced from… somewhere. He hadn’t even shared any with Rey, which seemed needlessly cruel.

“No, no. No vodka. Just water,” Rey replies. The man squints at her suspiciously, but eventually nods with a huff and leaves. She clocks out later and wonders if, perhaps, she should’ve told the truth – but he asked her not to and she kind of understands that sometimes a little bit of liquid courage to cope is required.

She has a blind date the next day, so takes the whole day off work, actually making an effort for a change. Normally she point-blank refuses to go on these things, but Finn had all but begged her to at least _try_ this one.

“He’s a pilot, peanut,” he’d told her, almost jumping in his seat. “ _And_ he loves cars, just like you. And he has a dog! You love dogs. Bea’s a corgi, and she’s great.”

So she’d agreed to at least try, and when she turns up at the restaurant the next night she’s not wearing a _dress_ , but she looks _nice_ , and she asks for the reservation under ‘Dameron’ because that’s his name, and she briefly worries about being able to split the bill with him because this place looks pricey.

He looks up as she approaches the table, and both of them freeze for a moment.

“Madame?” the waiter asks in a badly put on French-for-effect accent, and she waves her hand dismissively. She sits down across from this man – _Poe Dameron, I’m not an open book, lady Poe Dameron_ – and her lips tilt up as soon as the waiter leaves.

“I’m afraid I’m not on duty tonight. If you drink vodka and claim it’s water, I’ll know.”

“There goes my plan to tell my date about the bartender last night who was telling me all about salmon laws in England,” he replies with a smirk, sipping on what looks to be a coke (no vodka, just coke, she knows the difference).

She laughs, “Don’t worry, I’ll provide you with lots of other odd trivia. If nothing else, it makes me an awesome person to have on your team in trivia games.”

He grins, “Well, I assure you I can be far more charming tonight. Anyone would be, _without_ their abuela asking when they’re going to start bringing a wife to ‘these things’.”

He’s funny, actually. Even if men are still weird. They banter back and forth, and when the waiter comes over Rey hands him her menu and smirks at Poe while she orders.

“The salmon, please.”


End file.
